Several nights ago I dreamed about the boy I had a huge crush on my senior year of high school. He wasn't gorgeous or anything, but he was cute. He was a basketball player, kinda tall and skinny with brown eyes and brown curly hair he kept short. He was funny, always cracking people up, and would sing in the halls between classes. He had a great voice. Weird how I can remember that many details after all this time. I never told him about the crush. Looking back now, I think he may have liked me a little too, but we were never more than classroom friends. It makes me wonder how differently my life might have turned out if I wasn't such a shy social retard.
Anyway in this dream I was sitting with some people, eating or something and he just came up to the table to say hello. I stood and he gave me a hug lifting me off my feet the way he did once in high school. The really strange part is that he had a short, neat beard. I don't even like beards and I never saw him with one. Then he left and the dream moved on. But that is the only part that stuck in my head. Even now, two days later, I can feel that hug. Maybe I just needed a hug and that was the best one my memories could find!
The dream made me start thinking about the different people over the years who have changed my reality. Some of them may not have ever known I existed, or forgot about me the moment I left their presence. That train of thought led me to wonder if I have ever made such an impression on anyone. Has anyone ever loved me from afar? Wished they had the nerve to talk to me? Or just wanted to get to know me better than they did?
We never know the extent that we effect the people around us.
5 comments:
Great post, and it covers an idea that I often think about. Sometimes I wonder what I'd see if I got the George Bailey treatment, and got to witness a world in which I never existed. Would it be exactly the same? Would it be some twisted version of reality where my hometown was filled with gambling and vice-dens and whores?
Actually, I'd be disappointed to find it was my absence that caused something like that. I've always hoped my presence would cause that sort of thing. ;)
Anyway, I really enjoyed this post. I think you can't help but affect people's lives by touching them. And think of how many lives you're affecting just with this blog alone...
Wow, I was just thinking about the same thing this weekend. Actually, I was thinking about a guy in college that I would have considered more of a 'f'-buddy then, but I remembered that he always told me that he loved me. I just never believed him because he was usually drunk. Now I wonder if he really did and if he ever pined for me later. I don't mean that in an egotistical way, but like you said, just curious if I impacted him more than I realized. I know I've loved plenty of people from afar and never told them. lol
Not sure about most men, but I think most women are apt to think of this topic at least once a year. It Is one of those things.. where you feel so much that It drives you mad to thin no one out there feels back.
I often wonder about my life and the turns I have taken. I most often think of oneof my ex's, and what he is up to now. I havenever tried to contact him, nore would I even know where to start... but It Is still there in the back of my head.
Awesome post! Really makes you think. As a (former) teacher, I've often asked myself that question.
u HAVE had that effect on other ppl.
Post a Comment