Damn Carbs

So I've been reading a little more and I knew the carbs were going to have to be cut down, but I was clueless as to what all they are in! Even my yogurt has too many! I googled the lite version of it though, and it was ok. I also think I'm going to have to cut out sodas completely. I've cut back enormously the last half year or so. But maybe none. Or maybe just very limited, like a weekly treat or something. This is hard!

I'm just going to wing it for now, and in three months when I get re-tested I'll see if more changes need to be made or what.

And my life flashed before my eyes...

...or at least all the cheeseburgers I've eaten did. That's what happened this morning when I found out that my cholesterol is moderately high. And my uhhh...triglycerides are even higher! And I didn't even know what that was!

Let me start at the beginning. Last week I took my skinny eleven year old for her shots and checkup. They found her cholesterol is moderately high. Not worrisome, but changes needed to be made. Skip fried stuff at least most the time, and go from 2% to 1% milk. Also increased physical activity, but we were already working on that since she's moved back in. That was the doctor's recommendation. But as skinny, and fairly active as she is, I wondered if it was the hereditary kind so I had mine checked. Apparently it is.

So now I'm supposed to watch cholesterol, trans fat, and sugar. Or something like that. I seriously considered vegetarianism for a bout five minutes. But then decided it would probably be a good idea to do vegetarian meals maybe half the week. Can't hurt! I ordered a magazine subscription to read up on it. If I'm going to do it, I'd better do it right.

I did decide almost immediately that red meat is out. Period. And I don't think my levels are really high enough to have to do that, but that's what I felt I needed to do. I go on feelings a lot, and this is where I'm going. I am also adding fish to our diet more regular. Salmon and tuna were recommended for their high levels of omega 3, I think I got that worded right. There's so much I have to read up on!

I'm supposed to get mine checked again in three or four months. So, with the diet changes added to joining the gym a couple weeks ago, I will see what progress is made. If more changes need to be made then I will. I also asked if I should be tested for long term effects, but the nurse said they checked my liver...something...levels and all seems to be well there.

So I reinvent myself a little once again. Not completely, just a little morphing. But all is good. :)

The One Where I Ramble a Lot

One of my all-time favorite movies is Pride and Prejudice. I get so caught up in Elizabeth trying to decipher the personality of Mr. Darcy. It is also full of interesting dialog. I have to confess that I have never read the book. I've tried twice so far, I just can't get through the first couple of chapters.

Another one of my favorite movies is You've Got Mail. Which is interesting because one of the lead characters, Kathleen, talks about the book Pride and Prejudice more than once. The last few times I've watched it I also noticed parallels between the lead characters of both movies. I found that interesting.

Last Friday night I started a Beginning Yoga class. I loved it! I plan to go back each Friday. That gives me three days a week at the gym. Twice with a trainer, and once in yoga. Once I'm more used to it and not so sore between sessions, I will try to pop in for just a quick cardio one or two other days a week. Those just depend on the week. If I'm active away from the gym I won't. If I binge on cake I will. You get the idea. ;)

I took the girls out for Chinese last week. We had a good time, being inappropriately cheerful because the place wasn't crowded. Fortune cookie time was interesting. Tristin's said something about someone watching her from afar. She was tickled at first until I pointed out that it could be a warning for her to stop doing things she shouldn't. Brianna's said "Your lost possession will be found within the month." As it turns out she has a particular toy we can't find. I hope it turns up.

Then I started to read mine. Now we had been giggling over a cute guy not long before this, so I started off with "That hot guy is in love with you." Tristin cracks up, which was my intention. Then I actually read what mine says "Others appreciate your good sense of humor today." Well that was right on the money, wasn't it?

Found at Xmichra's

I am a Daisy What Flower Are You?

"You are just a sweet person. When a friend needs a shoulder to cry on, you are happy to offer yours with a box of tissues as well. Once in awhile, you wish you could be a little more dramatic but then sensibility sets back in and you know that you are perfect the way you are."

The One Where I Ramble a Little

Tonight I had my second training session. I am so sore! My abs hurt for two days after my first session. Tonight it's my thighs that are hurting. But I love my trainer! He's so comfortable to be with, and very patient. I don't dread going to the gym. I was nervous the first time, and a tad nervous this time, but more excited than nervous. And I saw the little hottie that first signed me up. That boy could have sold me the Brooklyn Bridge. ;) He did impress me by recognizing me and asking how I liked it. Most salesmen, which he basically is, completely forget you as soon as you have finished the sale.

It is no secret I am addicted to primetime. I have found a new show that's really awesome. Lie to Me, Wednesday nights at nine on Fox. It has Tim Roth in it (Incredible Hulk, Reservoir Dogs). He is delightfully anti-social. Sort of reminds me of Dr. House, only a little nicer. :)

The show brings science into seeing if someone is lying. If they had that class in college, I would have taken it and sat on the front row! I abhor liars. I don't understand lying and deception. Which unfortunately makes it easier for people to deceive me.

This show is awesome, check it out.

For Me

For the last eleven years I have been a mother. I very rarely do things for myself, and never do any really big things for me. Well, this week I have. And at the New Moon. (A few days early, but it needed to be on the weekend.)

So what is this big thing I've done for myself? I joined a gym. And signed up for multiple sessions with a trainer. My first session with a trainer is tomorrow. That was the expensive part, the trainer. I went to the gym with the intent to join. I have to do something, not just to look better but to feel better. Considering I know nothing about the machines or working out, I needed the trainer. So it's a treat for me. To make up for it I'll just tighten my budget more than I planned. That's no big deal, we are still doing better than we are used to doing. It's been a rough year, but we've made it and are doing better.

I'm not one of those women that spend a lot of money having their hair done or their nails done. I don't even get my eyebrows waxed anymore, I just pluck 'em myself the old fashion way. So a little extra money towards making myself fit and healthy is perfectly okay. I'm really excited about this. I have needed a change for a while, but just couldn't do anything about it. No time, no money. But now I've done it and I'm not going to waste a bit of it. :)

And we're back...

The cold is almost gone. My symptoms never really became unbearable, but I have been exhausted for over a week. Being sick is a real energy drain. This weekend I have two weekends worth of cleaning to do to catch up from laying around all weekend last week. And next weekend is when I'm getting a storage unit and emptying out my third bedroom for my oldest. Busy busy busy.

Found at Xmichra's

A
- Available: for the right person, otherwise, I'm too busy.
- Age: 36
- Annoyance: Constant coughing! My 11 yr old won't use cough drops!
- Animal: Cat

B
- Beer: very rarely
- Birthday: May 3
- Best Friend(s): I have a few
- Best feeling in the world: when you know the kids are contently sleeping and its very quiet, and you feel all your muscles relax and drift slowly to happy unconciousness...
- Blind or Deaf: how about neither? I'm damn near half deaf already and it sucks.
- Best weather: fall or spring
- Been in Love: briefly a couple of times
- Been on stage?: play in the fifth grade. various childhood concerts before that.
- Believe in Magic: of course

C
- Candy: usually not much, but occasionally crave chocolate
- Color: purple, red, black
- Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate all the way. - ditto
- Chinese/Mexican: I like both, depends on my mood.
- Cake or pie: cake
- Continent to visit: Europe
- Cheese: mozerella, parmesian, feta

D
- Day or Night: night, but I think I'm becoming a day person.
- Dancing in the rain: good idea, I should try that sometime.
- Eyes: blue
- Ever failed a class?: one in college. I took it over and got a B.

F
- First thoughts waking up: need to pee...
- Food: chicken ceasar salad,(I love this too Xmichra!), greek salad with feta cheese, no olives, olive garden pasta fajoli soup with salad and breadsticks, Salsaritas nachos and soft tacos. mmmmm...

G
- Greatest Fear: being left alone
- Goals: online thing, mini cooper, perhaps a house someday. And lots of focusing on my girls while patiently working towards fulfilling those goals. :)
- Get along with your parents?: sure
- Good luck charm: being right and fair. Karma and all that.

H
- Hair Color: light brown with a lil gray starting to show here and there.
- Height: 5'2
- Happy: yep
- Holiday: Christmas or Halloween
- How do you want to die: when I'm 102, or older I'll just go to sleep and not wake up. :)

I
- Ice Cream: : chocolate chip, or french vanilla with hot fudge on it.
- Instrument: want to play piano, but I don't do the whole read music translate notes to keys and stay on time. One sememster of it in college, and the teacher made it boring. Banjo might be fun to learn.

J
- Jewelry: dont wear much mostly. I have some I like to wear regularly, need to get back to doing that.
- Job: is good.
- Kids: I have two. That`s enough! (ditto)
- Kickboxing/Karate: I would like to learn enough to kick someone's ass if they messed with me.

L
- Love: Is a battlefield... lol.
- Laughed so hard you cried: I have before.

M
- Milk flavor: white or chocolate
- Movies: action, superhero, comedy, some chick flicks
- Motion sickness?: If I ride in the back of a car I usually get it.
- McD’s or BK: kind of sick of both

N
- Number: 3

O
- One wish: For me and my girls to live long, happy, and healthy. I want to see them grow up and make the right choices.

P
- Perfect Pizza: green peppers and mushrooms. Extra sauce please.
- Pepsi/Coke: pepsi, but occasionally coke.

Q
- Quail: wasn't he the vp or something a while back?

R
- Reason to cry: I'm watching Sleepless in Seattle, I'll prob tear up before its over. Damn you Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan.
- Reality T.V.: I have recently become addicted to Wife Swap and Super Nanny. The latter makes me feel much better about my children. The former makes me damn glad I'm single!
- Roll your tongue in a circle: yep. ;)
- Ring size: Which finger? I think my ring finger is a 4 or 4 and a half. First finger a 5 or 5 and a half.

S
- Song: Check my playlist on myspace. lol.
- Shoe size: 6 1/2 or 7
- Salad Dressing: greek or ceasar or italian
- Sushi: nope
- Slept outside: why? I'm not homeless.
- Smoked? In the past, and occasionally if I'm drinking and someone around lets me have one.
- Skinny dipped?: no
- Sing well?: well enough
- In the shower?: Not at the moment... lol.
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Strawberries! mmmm...
- Sunrise/Sunset: Sunset.

T
- Tattoos?: Yes, two and considering a third.
- Time for bed: 10 or 11 usually.
- Thunderstorms: as long as the winds are calm, sure. **I agree again with Xmichra.

U
- Unpredictable: sometimes

V
- Vacation spot(s): That would be nice. lol.
W
- Weakness: lounging around instead of doing something constructive.
- Who makes you laugh the most: Brianna
- Worst feeling: wanting to protect your children, but not being sure if you can.
- Wanted to be a model: umm...I'm 5'2", with no hips. Even as a teen I knew better than to want that.
- Worst Weather?: tornados scare the hell out of me. We don't get many here, but if it gets really windy, I get nervous.

X
- X-Rays: had a few or more
- Ex's: have a few or more. lol.

Y
-Year it is now: 2009
-Yellow: Can be ok for certain things, but isn't one of my top fav colors.
Z
- Zoo animal: lions and tigers and bears! oh my!

Last person who:
1. Slept in a bed beside you? Mr. Whiskers
2. You went to the mall with? by myself
3. You went to dinner with? haven't had dinner with anyone but the kids in quite some time.
4. You talked to on the phone? my mom
5. Made you laugh? Brianna
6. Hugged you? Brianna
7. Said they loved you? Brianna
8. Held your hand? Brianna...notice a theme here?
9. You spoke with? Both girls telling them to shush and sleep.
10. You cried over? hmmm...prob the girls. worried about something to do with them or something.

Things I Learned in 2008

1. When I bother to, I cook rather well.
2. I like living alone. (As in no other adults, kids don't count on that.)
3. I should trust my FIRST instincts. They are usually right. I screw up when I doubt myself.
4. Patience.
5. Being patient sucks.
6. I do not like fat guys.
7. I do not need a man. But sometimes I want one.
8. Sometimes a guy who seems deceptive is actually just really dumb.
9. I do not like dumb guys.

There are probably more things, but this is all I thought of tonight. If I think of a few more I might put up a part 2 or something.

A Whole New World

It all started with cutting back on expenses. My hours were shortened to four days a week for a few months, over the summer. I struggled month to month, finally in September I went back to five days a week. Things were smoother, but catching up takes time. I had to prioritize. Cable went to the bottom of the list. It didn't help that I absolutely HATE our cable company. I like Direct TV, had it for 7 years, but it's inconvenient in an apartment.

Anyway, I started noticing a disturbing pattern. We were just watching the same shows, the same reruns, over and over. The new shows I watch were all on network channels anyway. Finally, I made the decision to cancel cable. And I did. We have those old rabbit ears anteneas on both TVs (living room and my room). I need to get the converter boxes soon. My mom hasn't had cable for years, and already has a converter box. The channels come in almost cable clear.

I ordered AT&T DSL for my internet service since that was part of cable. I am still saving between $50 and $70 a month after the cost of DSL. And we didn't even have any movie channels! Once we are on our feet, which will be very soon, I plan to use the money we save from cable on DVDs, movies as well as a few favorite kid shows for Brianna to watch. That's the one drawback, there aren't many kid shows on network TV. Before we very rarely bought DVDs. I also want to join something like Netflix. We used to have a Blockbuster membership, but it just became to0 expensive for the monthly thing, and I never remember to turn them in on time just renting them the normal way.

As a bonus, I've noticed the kids don't instantly ask for the TV to come on when we are home. And I don't turn it on right away either. We go hours with no TV going, and we listen to music more. And I'm not sure about the girls, but I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything at all. I am glad I finally canceled it. :)

I really don't like video games...

...but I gave my oldest a Brain Age game for her Nintendo DS, and this thing is neat! I want a DS!!!

Christmas Eve To-Do List

1. Vacuum
2. Give Brianna a bubble bath
3. Bathe the dog
4. Dishes
5. Febreze all the carpets while dog is quarantined in bathroom to dry
6. Pick up the girls portraits before 2:45
7. Febreze the bathroom once the dog is let out
8. Bake chocolate chip cookies with the girls
9. Leave cookies and milk out for Santa
10. Watch The Polar Express in my room with the girls just before bedtime

I very rarely complete a day's to-do list. Today I did!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Blessed Be!
Happy Holidays, whichever you choose to celebrate.

My word cloud

Must See!

X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE HD

Quick Rundown...

So Tuesday the Ex says he's laid off. Wednesday, he got the job he'd been wanting for three or four years, coinky dink? I think not. He is going to be working at the Naval EOD school on Eglin Air Force Base near Destin Florida. In an instruction capacity. He went through the school there nine years ago.

So he waited til yesterday to pack up. He's on his way here now to leave Tristin with me. It will be late, very late. I have to get her enrolled in school tomorrow. When I told him we have to get up around 6:30 he said, and I quote, "I don't give a fuck." Nice.

But I'm calm. Things are going to be good, assuming he keeps those checks rolling in. He is afraid of losing his security clearance since I went to child support services last year, so I don't see a problem there. And in a few months I will have the money to finally make it all permanently over. Two and a half years to get a full divorce. Tennessee divorce law sucks.

And I'm still calm. My baby is coming home after almost a year. She will be better, we will be better, things WILL be better. I'm in a better place, I'm calm. And I will get her the therapy I told her father she needed a year ago. Divorce is hard on older kids. My little one was just two when it ended, she doesn't really remember before it was just us. We are going to take it one step at a time.

And I'm calm.

As Seen At Xmichra's and Karma's

ThREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Kat
2. Kathryn
3. Weesie (My granny nicknamed me that when I was born and still uses it.)

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. KatEyes
2. KatEyes4
3. Kat

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. eyes
2. smile
3. boobs

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. tummy
2. the melasma on my face (hormone induced splotches! not very obvious except to me but I hate them)
3. tummy

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Cherokee (25%)
2. Celtic
3. not so sure what all else

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. being alone too long
2. if its so dark I can't see (i have nite lites everywhere at home)
3. tornados

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. cell
2. computer
3. caffine
They all start with C!!!

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING NOW:
1. tshirt
2. undies
3. uhhhh...no third thing right now...


THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. Evanescence
2. buckcherry
3. ack! I dunno. I change it all the time.

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS RIGHT NOW:
1. Reach out by Hilary Duff (seriously!)
2. Keeps Getting Better by Christina Aguilera
3. Good Enough by Evanescence

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Intelligent conversation
2. comfort
3. hot sex

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
1. I am now thinking about sex
2. I'm not thinking about sex
3. I have blue eyes


THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. eyes
2. smile
3. arms

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. blogging
2. reading
3. cross stitch

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. finish my book, but watching Greys...
2. eat ice cream...will after I finish this!
3. hot sex comes to mind...(Dumped monday, daydreaming about what the next guy will look like on thurs. wow. I don't even really want a next guy yet!)

THREE CAREERS YOU’RE CONSIDERING/YOU’VE CONSIDERED:
1. Writer
2. Online store owner
3. fortune teller (But not seriously, I would have to talk to too many people.)

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. The British Isles
2. France
3. Italy

THREE NAMES YOU LIKE: (Other than the ones I used for my girls...)
1. Alexander
2. Elizabeth
3. Michael

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Publish a novel
2. finish all the crafts I have started or bought but not started
3. See Europe

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I luvs sparkly lip gloss.
2. I cry at some movies, songs, and tv shows. But not many.
3. Realy nice men's abs make me drool

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. I notice when hot chicks walk by. (don't want them, just notice)
2. goofy girls that squeal and hug make me naseous
3. I can belch out loud rather awesomely.

Tired

I am so tired right now. Deep down tired. This coming weekend is a four day weekend for me though, hopefully I will get the recharge I need. I don't have too much planned, we don't have a very large family locally. Thursday will probably just be me and my girls, Tristin is coming down for the holiday. Friday their dad is taking them to his mother's. I get them back that evening to take them downtown for Christmas lights and Santa. :) Saturday evening we are having our "family" dinner at my sister's house. It will just be both my sisters, their significant others, my niece, me and the girls. I invited the guy I'm seeing, but he wasn't sure about his own family goings ons. So not too very much going on. Plenty of time just to sit back and relax.